I may never get married

I may never get married

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How do I start talking about this shame that is about to destroy my life once again? Will this shame prevent me from getting married again now that another potential husband is truly in love with me?
My parents have exhausted a lot of resources to no avail; I have travelled all over the world in search of a solution, both orthodox and unorthodox, but still, there seems to be no solution. I’m a 36-year-old lady, whose wedding is in a month’s time, but the more the day draws nearer, the more worried I get. Do not get me wrong, I am not worried about the expenses because my husband and I are well-paid. My parents are not doing badly also.
As for my husband’s parents and siblings, they love me like their own, so this is not also the problem. But my condition cannot make me a normal bride, and this definitely will build the foundation for quarrels and/or eventual break-up.
For many years, I have been a compulsive bed wetter and no matter how I tried to avoid it, it still happened everyday. The worst part is that the urine flows like a river. If you asked me, I would say I was not born with the problem; it started when I was in secondary school. At first, I thought that it was a reaction to some medication because, unlike in the past, I couldn’t feel the urge to urinate when sleeping.
When the problem persisted, my parents withdrew me from the hostel and changed my school to one that was closer home. This was more because my roommates had started asking questions about why I kept washing my bed linen every day.
My parents initially tried the medical option, which made me go through a special operation. But this did not solve the problem. Then they tried the spiritual option and the condition improved for some time. But it started again, although I now skip some days. But I dare not sleep over in anybody’s house as it could come at anytime.
Even my siblings have accepted it as they always try to make me happy at all times. When they started getting married, their spouses initially thought I didn’t care for them because I couldn’t stay overnight in their homes; I always had to go back home the same day. But secrets are never hidden forever, so, soon enough, they got to know and have tried their best to help out one way or the other.
I have been dumped several times by men; sometimes days to the wedding. Initially, I used to tell them about it early in the relationship but after I noticed that they usually dumped me immediately, I decided to wait till a few weeks before my planned marriage to the suitor that came before my present fiance. But he still left me.
I used to hide under the guise of my religion not permitting me to sleep over at a man’s house till after the wedding. Sleeping over in their parents’ houses for them to get to know me well was also impossible. It got to a stage that if I had to go outside the state on official or personal visits, I would always stay in a hotel and also take along, a pack of adult diapers or bed underlay, just to absorb the leak.
My last boyfriend got angry when we went to visit his parents in another state and due to some delay, we could not leave that day. I, against their objections went to sleep in a hotel by myself. His parents were angry but my parents calmed them down, explaining that our doctrine frowned against such. The guy’s parents were even the ones that got another lady for their son when they learned about my condition.
I met my present fiancé after this. He has proved to be loving, understanding and patient; his parents have also taken me as their daughter. We stay in the same state so I have not been asked to sleep over in their house.
Now the problem is, with less than four weeks to our wedding, when and how would I let my man know about my pain? I am afraid of being dumped at the altar again; yet I don’t want to keep the secret and get dumped as a newly married lady. What do I do?

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